Virgin Island returns tonight (April 27), and among the new faces, 22-year-old Joy is already opening up about something rarely discussed on TV: her experience with vaginismus.
Joy – one of the season 2 participants – speaks candidly about living with the condition, which is often misunderstood and can have a major impact on both physical and emotional wellbeing.
In the first episode of the new series, she reflects on how her strict religious upbringing shaped her feelings, admitting: “At one point I thought God cursed me with vaginismus… like it was there to stop me from having sex.”
What is vaginismus? Joy’s story explained
Vaginismus is a condition where the muscles around the vagina tighten automatically when penetration is attempted. According to the NHS, this response is involuntary — meaning it happens without conscious control.
As a result, anything involving penetration — from sex to using a tampon or having a medical exam — can feel extremely difficult or even impossible.
Crucially, it’s not about a lack of desire. Vaginismus is a physical reaction that can be linked to anxiety, fear or past experiences, although in some cases there’s no clear cause at all.
How the Virgin Island experts support Joy
Joy’s journey is a key part of the new series, with the team of experts helping her gently work through the tension and anxiety she’s carried for years.
She traces some of those feelings back to a moment in her childhood. “When I was 12, I told my youth pastor I’d realised I’d been masturbating,” she explains. “There was this call for prayer for sexual sin… I felt like they were talking about me.”
She says that experience stayed with her: “It’s been hard to get that out of my head. I just want to feel free to explore that side of myself and enjoy my life.”
The show follows her as she begins to challenge those beliefs and reconnect with her body in a more positive way.
How painful can vaginismus be?
The experience varies from person to person, but for many, it’s far from mild discomfort.
Some describe a burning or stinging sensation, while others report sharp pain or a feeling of hitting a barrier. In more severe cases, penetration isn’t possible at all.
The NHS also highlights how the fear of pain can actually make symptoms worse, creating a cycle where anticipation leads to further tightening of the muscles.
That’s why the condition can be not just physically painful, but emotionally draining too — especially when it affects relationships or self-confidence.
What causes vaginismus?
There isn’t always a single explanation. Instead, it’s often a mix of physical and psychological factors.
These can include:
- Anxiety around sex or penetration
- Fear of pain
- Past negative or traumatic experiences
- Cultural or religious messaging about sex
- Previous medical issues or infections
In some cases, it can develop without any obvious trigger — which can make it even more confusing to understand.
Can vaginismus be treated?
The reassuring news is that vaginismus is treatable, and many people see significant improvement with the right support.
As seen in episode two, Joy begins to make progress, even describing moments of pleasure as she explores her body in a safe, guided environment.
Treatment typically focuses on helping both the body and mind feel more relaxed and in control. This can include:
- Pelvic floor exercises to improve muscle control
- Gradual use of vaginal trainers (dilators)
- Talking therapies to address anxiety or fear
- Guided education and exercises to build confidence
It’s usually a gradual process, done at a pace that feels comfortable. There’s no instant fix — but progress, as Joy’s story shows, is very possible.
What Joy hopes to gain from Virgin Island
Ahead of filming, Joy admitted she almost didn’t take part.
“I told my friends there was no way I’d go through with it,” she said. “But after watching series one, something changed.”
Despite living with vaginismus for years, she felt stuck: “I’d made very little progress and was starting to lose hope.”
She also opened up about the emotional challenges: “The biggest thing for me was dealing with shame… it was almost overwhelming at times.”
But she credits the experience — and the support around her — with helping her take those first steps forward.
“I’m so grateful for the other contributors, the experts and the welfare team,” she said. “They made me feel safe while I worked through something really personal.”
Read more: Virgin Island filming location revealed and how you can stay at the resort for £97 per night
Virgin Island is on Channel 4 tonight (April 27) at 9pm.
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