Peri-menopausal woman article
Lifestyle

The last 10 things a peri-menopausal woman wants to hear (you’ve been warned)

Only they can joke about it - okay?

If there’s a woman less patient than one with PMT, it’s one going through the peri-menopause – as her hormones decide to stage a full-blown revolt. Hot flashes, mood swings, and sleepless nights become the new norm. But worse, there’s now a parade of well-meaning individuals who can’t resist offering their pearls of wisdom. Thanks, Davina!

These 10 are the absolute worst – and to be avoided at all costs.

1. “Just relax, it’s all in your head”

Ah, yes, because a simple pep talk is all it takes to alleviate the night sweats that leave you drenched like you’ve just completed a marathon. If only our bodies understood the power of positive thinking!

Peri-menopausal words of wisdom (not)

2. “You’re too young for menopause”

Well, thank you for reminding me of my ever-advancing age while I’m busy wringing out my soggy pajamas at 3 a.m. Apparently, menopause is reserved for the elderly, and my body didn’t get the memo.

3. “Have you tried herbal remedies?”

Oh, absolutely! I’ve ingested enough sage, black cohosh, and evening primrose oil to open a herbal tea shop. If only these magical potions could turn back time or at least grant me a decent night’s sleep.

Peri-menopausal article - woman with a fan
Don’t aggravate a peri-menopausal woman – she’s hot and bothered (Credit: Pexels/Cottonbro Studio)

4. “Maybe it’s just stress”

Yes, because being in a constant state of internal combustion and feeling like a human pressure cooker is the epitome of relaxation. Thanks for pointing out the obvious. Perhaps I should take up meditation in the middle of a supermarket aisle.

5. “Why don’t you exercise more?”

Ah, the solution to all life’s problems – exercise! Because sweating profusely during a workout is exactly what I need when I’m already sweating like a marathon runner in the Sahara. Maybe I should just strap on a treadmill and wear it like a hat.

Read more: 10 worst things to say to a woman on her period

6. “Are you sure it’s not your diet?”

Yes, it’s my diet that’s to blame for the spontaneous combustion happening within my body. Maybe I should trade in my morning coffee for a handful of ice cubes and start grazing on lettuce like a rabbit. Problem solved!

Hor-moans

7. “You’re just being hormonal”

Ah, the classic dismissal of women’s emotions. It’s not like our hormones are currently engaged in an epic battle royale inside our bodies. Nope, it’s just our feeble female emotions running amok. Silly us!

8. “You’ll feel better once it’s over”

Oh, joy! Just hold on tight while I navigate this hormonal rollercoaster that seems to have no end in sight. But sure, I’ll patiently wait for the light at the end of this sweaty tunnel.

Every cloud…

9. “Enjoy it while it lasts – it means you won’t get pregnant!”

Well, that’s one silver lining in this hormonal thunderstorm. Because what woman doesn’t enjoy being reminded of her dwindling fertility while she’s busy battling the emotional whirlwind of peri-menopause?

10. “It’s just a natural part of life”

Oh, thank you for that profound insight. I had no idea that this phase of life was completely natural. I mean, who needs empathy and understanding when we can just dismiss it as a rite of passage?

What’s the worst advice or joke you’ve heard as a peri-menopausal woman? Leave us a comment on our Facebook page @EntertainmentDailyFix and let us know.

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